MR. OSCAR’S TWITTERVERSE

RED CARPET E TV:

ME:  Has a mani-cam which allows celebrities to show their fingernails.  Why discriminate against foot folks?  Where is the pedi-cam?

Tristan ?@TristanAriel:  Bradley Cooper mom is a real philly chick talking bout “hi philadelphia” on the red carpet lol.

Vulture ?@vultureThe @fuggirls: “The nipple darts on Hathaway’s dress are INTENSE.”Henry Schulman ?@hankschulman:  If I were on the red carpet and was asked “whom I was wearing” I could honestly say, “Why, this is from the house of Kirkland.”

Adam Goldenberg@adamgoldenberg: The #Oscars are about to be overrun by millions of dogs, all drawn to the sound of Kristin Chenoweth’s voice.

THE OSCAR’S:

Kyle Challancin@itsapear: IT’S HAPPENING. IT’S STARTING. I CAN’T BREATHE.

ME:  This ain’t your father’s Oscars. Which actresses showed their boobs in movies? A flying nun tonguing Sally Fields??

@HuffingtonPost: “I got a bottle of wine and some Boniva..” Seth MacFarlane as Flying Nun hits on Sally Field #Oscars” Funniest line so far.

Beth ?@thecoolbeth:  My mom just called me and asked “who is Seth MacFarlane.”

Thomas ?@thoscarpenter:  Tommy Lee Jones’s face looks like a relief map of the ocean floor.

Diane Sharp ?@DSharpie:  Bob DeNiro for pretending to be an Eagles fan. Even Philadelphians can’t do that anymore.

Michael J. Listner ?@ponder68@MarsTweep:   Better to watch #thewalkingdead. At least the zombies are fiction unlike those at #oscars.

Roger Ebert@ebertchicago:  My four stars for the breath-taking vision of “Life of Pi.” http://dld.bz/ckhJM

erica@futt:  who decided it would be a good idea to play off the “life of pi” team with the “jaws” music?

Tom Storch@TomRStorch:  Best Bond: George Lazenby. So good he only needed to do one.

Anuya J@boozeandshooze:  Wow that Bond montage was as long as Les Mis.

Sabrina Kalliope@SawBreeNah:  I want to be a Bond Girl. I’m doing lunges right now.

jess.@JessWolfy:  is it sad that i only like watching the #oscars for all the #prettydresses?

michael epps@michael_epps:  Dame Shirley in the house!

Mark Estano@mje1986: The Bond retrospective just proved that Daniel Craig is the sexiest Bond girl ever.

Ben Bavalia@ben_bav:  Enjoying the use of #Jaws soundtrack to force the winners off!

mazie jacoby@mazmaxjac:  I’m only alive to watch the #oscars and Olympic gymnastics. And listen to Bob Dylan.

El Jefe@jefesural  Best Doc or ‘life is far more horrid than you know so we’re making a movie about it’.

Brit Tait Kellogg@BTaitKellogg RT @WINonline: RT @WSJ:  The median age of an Academy voter is 62. They are 94% Caucasian and 77% male. http://on.wsj.com/WkLaju 

Gregg Pavone@LimelightSignCo:  If he doesn’t win best director, Ben Affleck should get an honorary Oscar for overcoming the J-Lo years.

Alex Fitzpatrick@alexleefitz:  I’m an asshole and even I think the Jaws playoff music is a little much.

Steve Hofstetter@SteveHofstetter:  Sacha Baron Cohen went from Borat and Bruno to kicking ass in Les Mis. I’d like to see Larry the Cable Guy try that.

George-Anne A&E@GeorgeAnneAandE:  Poor Marky Mark was in “The Departed” a few years ago and is now having to pretend to be standing next to a teddy bear.

Shelby Taylor@ShelbyxPwns:  Not gonna lie, Ted is fucking my mind right now.

Love My Ice@harglo123:  Jesus, couldn’t get a tux to fit, Wahlberg??

Tyler Vivian@tylervivian:  even Bud Selig is appalled that the #Oscars can have a tie.

Brendan Andrew@BrendanDarr:  Dudes with long hair haven’t gotten this much run since Almost Famous.

Joy Noelle@JoNoSo:  Soooo if you have a long speech you get eaten by a shark?

Konrad Johnson@KonradJohnson:  The last #oscars tie was in 1969, when Barbra Streisand and Katharine Hepburn tied for Best Actress.

Mitch Kinard@mitchkinard:  One day, Tarantino will be 80 years old, and there will never be a more terrifying underbite to receive such acclaim.

Charles Mayaka@TheMayaka:  Are we that sensitive to our history that we can’t even have a clip of Django?

Jordana Stein@jordanastein:   All the old people at our oscar party just died over Babs performance.

On The Red Carpet@OnTheRedCarpet:  That was the first time Barbra Streisand performed at the Oscars in 36 years.

MT @waitwait:  I know there’s probably a rule or something, but don’t you wish the tiger from Life of Pi was there in a tuxedo?

Zandile Blay Amihere@zandile:  i will always be profoundly confused by renee zelleweger’s face. always.

Dennis Lawson@gr33nazn:  Just 2 more Botox injections and Renee Zellweger’s eyes will disappear forever.

Tom + Lorenzo®@tomandlorenzo:  Chicago is now the frontrunner to win Best Picture.

Tom Bodett@TomBodett:  I’d like to go up to bed, but my legs are asleep all the way to my ears.

nick kroll@nickkroll:  Ladies and gentlemen, the academy would like to recognize one of everything!

Well folks, my legs are working but, in my attempt to bring you an overview of pop culture, I was able to watch this mind-numbing exercise until 11 P.M.–one hour longer than last year.

Must have been the naked breast song at the beginning of the show.

 

6 thoughts on “MR. OSCAR’S TWITTERVERSE

  1. I was extremely entertained by the show…don’t know if that makes me shallow and superficial and don’t care. Loved those tweets! So funny and spot on! By the way, I think Tommy Lee Jones is incredibly handsome.

  2. “…one of everything.” I laughed so hard at that.

    “ME: Has a mani-cam which allows celebrities to show their fingernails. Why discriminate against foot folks? Where is the pedi-cam?” I am going to address this on the next show!

    This was a hoot! Thanks Zach!

  3. What a fun post! I missed the Oscars. On purpose. So thanks for catching me up, I enjoyed the tweets. I’m so new to Twitter I still forget to follow the trends during big events. Head smack!

    • Cindy–The tweet round-up is an annual post. But the real interesting article will be this coming Monday’s interview with Oscar. I mean it’s time to find out who this guy is and what he really thinks about the award show–both past and present.

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